Jenna vroomed us off to Guide Dog School today, in the place the hoomans call Lemmington Spar. I had a lie down while the hehooman Michael (Dog Care and Welfare Advisor) woofed all my deepest secrets about my past to Ma and Pa. It seems I am safe! No awful secrets to reveal. It seems I have something called a completely clean health record. Ma and Pa now know I have 36.6 keelos, whatever they are and that I have to go the the vet in March.Continue reading
Month: February 2019
Day 12 – New hooman friends, long workieses and hoomanhowling

New Hoomanfriends Tim & Lindsay
Visitors! First thing in the morning! Yippeee! I was happily chilling on the rug, and Ma disturbed me and got me ‘On yer bed, Ted’ under the table. I thought that was a tad odd, but obliged, but then chuggyboat did a rockyrolly and I heard we had visitors at the door! I tried to shove my way past Ma to go greet, but she wouldn’t let me! She woofed something about ‘Stay. You need to learn manners for visitors’. Anyway, after just a few moments of the agony of waiting, I was allowed out to greet. It seems these hoomans are special friends of Ma & Pa’s and they are known as Tim and Lindsay. They are very nice hoomans…..they are clearly doggy-doters! I like doggy-doters! Good loves come from doggy-doters! So, today, I’ve had good loves all day! Heehee!Continue reading
Day 11 – TurboTed Chillaxing
A day off! Well…almost. A day off from GDMI training anyway.
I did have to take Ma workies to Tesco and back – Twice! The first time, it was just the two of us and we went to that bit where all the hoomancoverings are. I had to do a ‘Sit. Down. Stay’ while Ma faffed through the hangings. I have no idea why she didn’t just take the one at the front! I watched and she went almost to the very back, but what she pulled out was exactly the same as the first one! Duh! Oh, well.. it was a lie down for me! I then took her for a bit of a wander around the rest of the shelves and then did a ‘Find the checkout’. Checkout finded! Another chance for a quick lie down! That was very rudely interrupted though by a shehooman pushing her wheeliecage onto my botty! How very rude! I got out of the way quick! Continue reading
Day 10 – A good day
It all started with GDMI coming aboard chuggyboathome. I had to go ‘on yer bed, Ted’ while she came in the door! This is a new move! It seems, I am not to go greeting visitors with full enthusiasm at the door. I am to stay on my bed until they are inside and then greet calmly and politely. Not sure how I feel about this…….Continue reading
Day 9 – Shopping, Obedience and Locks
The day started with Ma woofing away for ages on her talkybone. I kept her amused by presenting her with a good range of my toys – all delightfully soggy! I’m sure it helped to get her through the long woofingtime! Finally it stopped though and I got to go take her to Tesco. Just me and Ma! Woohoo! It felt pretty good to be doing that without GDMI at our heels. Ma was a bit slow though – her back leg was ouching, so I kept it ‘Steady’ for her. She did keep up a bit of a non-stop yipping of ‘Straight on. No! (when I tried to sneak in a quick sniff on the way). Get on. On we go. Good boy. Straight on…..’ I didn’t get away with any snaffling or sniffing! Boo! Still, we did it! I did my job and Ma got the froot that she wanted. When we got to the rumbling chilly shelves, she asked me to ‘keep in’ (come to the right) to one particular spot. Then she asked me to ‘Sit’ while she reached out to pick up a pot of yellow something. Then she squinted closer at it and it seems it wan’t what she thought it was, so she asked me to ‘Down. Stay’ and laid my lead down beside me. I stayed like a pro while she squinted all along the shelves until she found what she wanted. Then she came back to me and gave me super loves! I took it all gladly and rolled onto my back for maximum reception! Continue reading
Day 8 – Two ticks and a train
Phew! No more of that blimmin traffic hazards stuff! We’ve conquered that challenge and got a big tick for it. Well, Jenna woofed something about ticking that off anyway – whatever that means. We did a really intensive session of it this morning with the vroomer coming at us from all angles; from the left, from the right, straight across the pawment, from left behind, from right behind, from left in front and right in front. I didn’t so much as twitch from the kerb on any of them! Ma was super pleased with me and so was Jenna. The chest rub and hugs proved it!Continue reading
Day 7 – Obstacles and hazards
Not my favourite set of activities today! We Guide Dogs all hate this bit of training our hoomans. It is quite hard work and somewhat stressful, but it has to be done! It’s not a problem for us, we have been trained and drilled and practiced in it all sooooooo much that we can almost do it in our snoozetime. It is the hoomans that have problems with it, and Ma was no exception today. In fact she made a complete goofup (I don’t think that was the term she woofed at the time!) of one of the manoeuvres. Continue reading
Day 6 – All around the houses and on the bus
Today has been all about indents and kerbs and shopping.
It all started with Ma getting all ecstatic because I did a poo for her! Hoomans are so very odd! Apparently it is really good that I did a ‘big busy’ for Ma when she asked me to. Well….. odd or not, I can cope with enthusiastic ‘Good boy’ praise for doing what comes naturally! It seems that GDMI was pleased too. Ho Humm!Continue reading
Day 5 – Soggy Doggy Off to Church
Ma vvzzzzd the flappy door open and wanted me to go out. I thought about it. I stuck my nose out there but got dripped on! Yuck! I’m a Retriever! I don’t DO drips! I don’t do wet stuff! I tried to turn around and head back inside chuggyboat home. The doors were shut and locked, and Ma was insistent! Meh! I had no choice, there was only one way to go and that was out. NOT impressed!Continue reading
Day 4 – Killer Hill
We waited a while for GDMI to arrive today, but the time was filled with a visitor! A canine visitor! A doggybuddy!

Jasper and me meeting and greeting
His name is Jasper and he is a little Staffie / French Bulldog pocket rocket! Oh…. he did bring a hooman too: Adrian. He was a nice hehooman. There’s not much room inside chuggyboat to play with a buddy, but we managed to get on though. It was very nice to have a visitor!Continue reading